Raising Children: They'll Do As They Please

No one can tell you what to do. It's a proven fact of human nature. No matter how right that other person may be, or how wrong they may think you seem, you will never do what anyone will ever ask you. You will always do what you desire, and what you think is best. Sure, other people's opinions and thoughts may cause some influence, but your actions are never a direct influence of other people. Your actions come from something inside of you telling you what to do.

Is that a bad thing though?

If you are confident in yourself, then of course not. Now, if you question yourself, than this kind of thinking may do more harm than good.

I've always been one to know exactly what I wanted. Growing up as a rebellious, but still loving teenager, I would overhear my mother telling other people, "She will just do what she wants, what can I do." To give my mother some credit, she did a lot. I was grounded plenty and punished for my actions. Her reasoning though, was correct. I would never admit I was wrong until I knew deep down inside that I was the wrong one. 

So what do you do when someone close to you is making the wrong decision?

You can't say or do anything that can change their mind. What you can do, is be there for them, guide them, and build their confidence in themselves so that you can trust that they know what is best for them.

This is the type of mentality I hope to bring to my children as they get older and go through the phases of discovering who they are.

Sure it will be hard to understand that loving them, and disciplining them, is not the same thing as making them do what I please.

I hope to build their confidence in their decisions, and that they must always do what is right for themselves.

Because no one can tell you what to do. Except yourself.